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Sunday, August 28, 2011

Sometimes life sucks.

Yes it truely does. I found out I was pregnant 2 weeks ago. We were so happy. I told my hubby, and my boss, and two coworkers so that they would understand if I needed time off or rest. We told my mother in law, I told my sister. And from there everything went down the drain.

I went to y gyno because I had a very light pink discharge. And that's when the worst diagnosis hit me. My little one nested itself into my right tube instead of my uterus.

I had a emergency operation on Friday the 19th. My dad's birthday was on the 20th and I couldn't even call him or write him over the interwebs cause I was still in the hospital recovering. I was out of the hospital on Moday morning (22nd) and I think I cryed over my loss every night I was in there.
I am so thankful that my hubby put everything away before I came back home. I started a pregnancy diary, and I surely didn't want to see that when I got home.

Now i'm recovering body wise from the operation. Sould wise i'm starting too. I realized I was punishing my body with food. And my poor body couldn't even help it. I keep telling myself that it was the embryos fault. It didn't nest where it was supposed to. It helps me some.

Now I have another 2 or 3 weeks of not allowed to do anything. My right side hurts like a SOB when the weather changes. And it's doing that on a hourly basis sometimes. I have a load of time on my hands for i'm not allowed to go to work until it is well healed. And today I promised myself to stop punishing my body.

I will look at the good things in life. And in 6 months i'm allowed to try again. Maybe the third time is the charm.